Look, gifts are great and all, but you know what really adds a bang to your partner’s birthday? Actual banging, but where they get to lay back and relax on their special day. Here’s how to make that birthday sex an experience they will never forget:
Even if your partner HATES surprises, they’ll probably be into this one. Sit them down and blindfold them for a strip tease. As you take off each article of clothing, brush the fabric across their cheek and let them feel each new body part you reveal with their mouth or hands. Straddle their lap and slide them inside you, never once letting them actually see you. You just gave them a front row seat to the best show on earth.
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If they’ve had a particularly stressful week around their birthday, help them really unwind. Fire up a candle that melts into massage oil for instant mood lighting and warm, scented oil. Take your sweet time and experiment with different sensations—gentle light touches, deep strokes—then pop a pillow under their hips and finish with a happy birthday handjob. (Finger up the butt is an optional add-on).
Tease them pre-birthday for all-day foreplay. Send a pic of a toy you’re gonna use, a peek of side boob or a link to lingerie you’ll be wearing. Escalate as it gets closer—take to your bed and keep them apprised of exactly what’s going down via texts and Snaps. Right before they arrive, let them watch you ravish yourself with your hands or a vibrator before they can’t stand it anymore and jump in with you.
This is definitely more suspenseful than opening a present. Have them press their hands against the wall and stand behind them. Lube your hands and run them over their crotch, alternating hands so it feels like a continual upward motion. Switch to a more intense, rhythmic rubbing to get them close to orgasm, then stop just before they do. You can also use a vibrator on them, pulling away right at the last second. Continue the tortuous-amazing edging until you hear begging, then give them the incredible release they’ve been waiting for.
Look, sometimes the best birthday sex is just cozy and simple. Spooning is wonderfully non-fussy–you’re both comfortable, it feels extra huggy and affectionate, and (most importantly!) your partner has very easy access to your clit. It’s perfect for, say, testing out a new vibrator that they may have bought for the special occasion. And if you’ve been wanting to knock anal off your bucket list, this is one of the best positions for first-timers because it’s so calming and encourages gentle thrusting. It’s your day! Do as you goddamn please.